Monday, July 30, 2007

Oh, how you've grown!

One of the first things that I say when seeing the children of friends after a period of time apart is, "Oh! They are getting so big!"

Usually, that comment is countered with ideas like, "Now so and so has learned to walk." or "Can you believe how fast they are growing?"

It seems to be part of being a parent that you automatically slip into brag mode when talking about your kids. It is even worse if you haven't seen that person in a while.

I guess that adults can be this way as well. When a high school or college reunion is coming up, everyone scrambles to lose 10 pounds, get their roots touched up, and wishes that they had a more exciting job to describe. We feel the need to prove that we have grown into more than people expected of us.

I find myself wishing sometimes that someone would notice my spiritual growth. No one ever says things like, "You really have matured in the faith since the last time I saw you." or "I see you becoming more like Jesus." Yes, I know. It would be weird if anyone actually said those things outloud to me.

But, I long to be growing. I want to be moving in the right direction. I desire maturity more than anything else. And sometimes, I just want to know if I'm on the right track. I want those that are older and wiser in the faith to see me growing in the right direction.

I wonder, though, if that is pride on my part. Do I want to hear others say, "Oo! Look how spiritual she is!" Because that's not healthy growth at all; that's cancer!

What do you think about that?

Where did the title come from?

I freely admit that the title, "The Dance of the Devoted Daughter" sounds strange from someone with my background! After all, there is not much dancing my church!!

So, I thought that I would explain myself. This title was my response to a book I read titled, "The Dance of the Dissident Daughter" by Sue Monk Kidd. I love Ms. Kidd's writing! Her fiction is captivating and I devour her work. This particular book was not fiction, though. It was Ms. Kidd's personal story of a spiritual search for a place of meaning, as a woman. Ms. Kidd had been a Christian for years and in fact wrote Christian articles and books. But, at 40 years of age she began to see that her Christian journey was masculine, not feminine.

The pain that she honestly presents and the quest for a feminine expression of faith spoke deeply to me. I too feel that much of my spirituality must be put in masculine terms because those are the only terms that my church presents. And yet, my logic tells me that God made us male and female for a reason. Shouldn't there be a way to be fully feminine and fully godly? When Ms. Kidd began to search for that intersection of realities, she couldn't find it. And so, she left the church, and the theology of this patriarchal system to find her own way. She became the dissident daughter.

I couldn't wrap my arms around the conclusions that Ms. Kidd reached and the decisions that she made based on them. I believe in the importance of the church, local and global. I believe that God in trusted His mission of reconciliation to the broken vessel that is the church. So, I vowed to be the devoted daughter. I vowed to stay. Staying, for me, is harder than leaving. I experience pain often from closed doors and shut down thinking. But, I believe that I have been called to pioneer a new way. I believe that God created men and women to work side by side in the kingdom. I believe that someone has to be willing to sacrifice their own comfort for the good of those that will follow. I choose this dance because I believe it honors God with all that I am. I believe that this is my life's work.

What do you think?

Monday, July 23, 2007

Getting Started

Well, I've been told that it is time to enter this world called blogging for a very long time. I am finally jumping in!

It is my desire that this blog be a place to begin conversations about living a life worthy of the name of our king. I've titled this blog "The Dance of the Devoted Daughter" because that phrase outlines who I desire to be. I want to be a princess that brings honor to the name of my Father in all that I do.

Will you journey with me?